shylocks:

if english isn’t your first language but you think and dream in english and sometimes have to mentally translate from english to your first language when speaking it as a consequence of your consistent exposure to the internet clap your hands

(via fellowship-of-the-sherlockians)

missespeon:

my brain: there is literaly a 0 percent chance the fictional shit from creepy games will show up irl in your kitchen

me: but its dark and scary

(via 2srooky)

adorability:

I love when you become so close with someone that you can see parts of each other in one another and you begin to say the same things and steal lines from one another and have a similar sense of humor and can exchange an inside joke with just a glance you don’t even have to talk because you have such a strong connection with them and you can sit in comfortable silence but also talk for hours it’s really hard to find that kind of compatibility

(via poisoned-foodforthought)

punkasfrick:

punkasfrick:

"Son," the father says, examining the broken petri dishes littered about the floor, “I’m not a mad scientist, I’m just a disappointed scientist.”

I don’t even care what you think this is the best post I’ve ever made

(via poisoned-foodforthought)

yeah-i-dont-like-this-day:

darnni:

textbookfangirl:

agnaeoh:

gaymur-gurl:

alexandraerin:

breakthenorm:

redcloud:

thedaddycomplex:

futurefantastic:

jonny5fefrenzy:

-knock knock.
—who’s there?
-freedom.

freedom would never knock
freedom rings

And if it takes longer than 30 minutes, your freedom is free.

If you experience freedom lasting four hours or more, contact your physician immediately.

eagle sold separately  

*Some restrictions apply.

batteries not included

limited time offer

side effects may include liberty and justice for all

this entire country is crazy.

Some assembly required.

yeah-i-dont-like-this-day:

darnni:

textbookfangirl:

agnaeoh:

gaymur-gurl:

alexandraerin:

breakthenorm:

redcloud:

thedaddycomplex:

futurefantastic:

jonny5fefrenzy:

-knock knock.

—who’s there?

-freedom.

freedom would never knock

freedom rings

And if it takes longer than 30 minutes, your freedom is free.

If you experience freedom lasting four hours or more, contact your physician immediately.

eagle sold separately  

*Some restrictions apply.

batteries not included

limited time offer

side effects may include liberty and justice for all

this entire country is crazy.

Some assembly required.

(via somesayimquiet)

avengersonna:

jazzybellblue:

Bruh ltvalentine aurelinejanell bounddnce

I’m gona die

(Source: ruinedchildhood, via somesayimquiet)

shialabeowulf:

piertotum-locomottor:

youvegottthelove:

im-just-a-match-in-water:

toyoungtolivethisway:

officialalltimelow:

Press play and enjoy fuckers.

holy

At first I’m just like “it’s fucking clapping, I don’t ca-” and then he began to sing and I took in such a deep breath my uncle had to make sure I was ok.

GOOD BYE FRIENDS I AM GONE

If you don’t reblog an acoustic version of My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark (Light ‘Em Up), something is wrong with you.

died

(via somesayimquiet)

assbutt-in-the-garrison:

penceyprepofficial:

when I was like 9 my neighbors asked me to watch their fish and cat while they went on vacation and I was like “lol k” and while they were gone tHE FUCKING FISH DIED so when they got home I apologized to the mom and she was just like “no need to apologize, I turned the filter off so they would die because they are too much work. You did nothing wrong” and she gave me 20 bucks and that is the story of my first contracted murder

your first…?

(Source: blakcparade, via somesayimquiet)